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Definición de ghosting

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Por qué no deberías practicar ‘ghosting’, aunque esté de moda

Las rupturas en la era virtual, la nueva forma de dar por terminadas las relaciones puede parecer trivial pero tiene consecuencias negativas.

Dejar repentinamente de contestar llamadas y mensajes para romper con la pareja es una práctica cada vez más común

Un hombre sentado en la calle consulta su móvil. Oleg Elkov / Getty Images/iStockphoto

Existen muchas formas de acabar una relación , pero si el ghosting comienza a ser algo tan común quizá se deba a que la tecnología también ha cambiado la forma en que nos vinculamos los unos con los otros. Lucía Martín , periodista y autora de Hola, sexo (Almuzara) reconoce que hace tiempo que se pregunta si son las redes las que nos hacen ser maleducados y poco empáticos con los demás o si estas no son más que el reflejo de la sociedad en que vivimos: “Creo que las redes acentúan nuestra forma de ser y que el anonimato con el que podemos comunicarnos a través de ellas no genera cosas muy buenas: es la puerta abierta a una serie de comportamientos que no se darían en un bar, por ejemplo. Si tú eres una persona maleducada, egocéntrica y egoísta, las redes o las aplicaciones de citas no van sino a acentuar estos rasgos. Y si eres una persona educada, como tal te comportarás en las redes, aunque es verdad que el anonimato favorece conductas que nunca tendrías en un cara a cara ”.

“Cualquier persona es capaz de hacer ‘ghosting’; es más una cuestión de forma de ser que de género”

Lucía Martín Periodista y escritora

Martín no cree que haya un perfil concreto de persona proclive a hacer ghosting ni a recibirlo. Ni cree que los hombres sean más propensos a practicarlo que las mujeres: “Creo que cualquier persona es capaz de hacer ghosting . Es más una cuestión de forma de ser que de género. Se acusa muchas veces a los hombres de hacerlo, pero nosotras también lo practicamos”. Para Vicente Marco , autor de la novela La mujer geométrica (Almuzara), en la que la comunicación a través de internet tiene un especial protagonismo, “el peligro de las redes es desnaturalizar. Cada día que pasa somos más virtuales. Nuestra comunicación con el exterior se virtualiza . Nuestras relaciones se virtualizan porque la técnica nos resulta práctica y cómoda. Sin embargo, no existen grandes diferencias entre ese mundo virtual y la ficción. En consecuencia, esa ausencia de realidad nos conduce a valorar menos el entorno. A trivializar . No somos capaces de ponernos en el lugar de los demás porque los demás, en muchos casos, no los conoceremos nunca; es muy posible que desaparezcan de buenas a primeras o, simplemente, no se dé la ocasión; y también es muy probable que no existan, que solo sean perfiles que soportan una identidad de alguien que puede estar muy cerca”.

Una mujer con expresión triste tumbada en la cama. praetorianphoto / Getty Images

Hoy en día sabemos que el rechazo de cualquier tipo activa nuestros circuitos del dolor , pues la conexión con otros seres humanos es un rasgo evolutivo propio de los seres humanos. Nuestro cerebro identifica la conexión con la supervivencia, de ahí que la rotura de esa conexión pueda llegar a herirnos tanto. Mucho más si además, como sucede en estos casos, no existe sensación de cierre. “Creo que si tenías una implicación sentimental con la persona que te hace ghosting te dolerá mucho, te asaltarán interrogantes”, explica Lucía Martín. “Solemos preguntarnos por qué esa persona ha desaparecido, qué hemos hecho mal , qué hemos dicho... y la mayor parte de las veces no tiene que ver con nosotros. El otro/a desaparece porque hoy en día las relaciones que surgen en estas herramientas son totalmente líquidas , y parece que da igual si te vas sin despedirte o sin dar una explicación. Se ha perdido , ya no digo solo la seducción, sino la más mínima urbanidad ”.

Cómo recuperarse del ‘ghosting’

Vicente Marco coincide con la periodista y escritora al afirmar: “Con las redes hemos ganado en desinhibición . Son herramientas que te permiten comunicarte a todas horas y no existe la barrera presencial que coarta a muchas personas a la hora de expresar afectos, pensamientos o emociones . Esto es bueno y la herramienta muy útil, el problema nace cuando, en muchas ocasiones, tendemos a la degeneración, al mal uso , conscientemente o sin darnos cuenta. Ya pasó con las televisiones que poco a poco fueron derivando en programas basura a los que se enganchan muchos espectadores, pero la red es mucho más potente y mucho más peligrosa. Y el problema es que no somos capaces de vislumbrar esa potencial malignidad”.

La irrupción de la tecnología ha cambiado también las relaciones amorosas. simarik

¿Y qué hacer para superar el ghosting ? ¿Cómo espantar al fantasma? Martín recomienda: “De entrada, no cuestionarse (salvo que sí hayas metido la pata hasta el fondo y seas consciente de ello, claro). Y creo que sobre todo lo que hay que hacer es recuperar la forma de conocer gente que teníamos antes de las redes : salir a la calle y ligar en otros entornos. Las redes de ligoteo están muy bien, son una herramienta más, pero si entras en ellas tienes que conocer todas estas reglas no escritas y blindarte de antemano para no llevarte un bofetón ”.

Cuestionarse a uno mismo, como explica la autora de Hola, sexo , es la reacción más frecuente en las personas que sufren esta forma abrupta de terminar una relación. Los expertos coinciden en señalar que lo primero que debemos pensar si alguien nos hace ghosting es que su actitud habla más de la persona en cuestión que de nosotros. Lo segundo es permitirnos sentir el dolor , la decepción , la vergüenza o lo que sea que estemos sintiendo en ese momento. El tercer paso sería hablar de ello con alguien de confianza : diversos estudios han mostrado que poner palabras a los pensamientos puede cambiar nuestros patrones cerebrales y ayudarnos a procesar experiencias dolorosas. En último lugar, es importante poner énfasis en el autocuidado . Otras investigaciones han señalado que recurrir a los básicos como comer bien, dormir lo suficiente y hacer algo de ejercicio es muy importante para gestionar el dolor , incluido el de las decepciones amorosas fantasmagóricas. Prácticas como el yoga, la meditación y el mindfulness reducen la producción de hormonas del estrés en el cuerpo y pueden llegar a cambiar incluso algunas conexiones neuronales relacionadas con el dolor.

“Con las redes hemos ganado en desinhibición”

Vicente Marco Autor de la novela La mujer geométrica

Un mujer participa en un ejercicio de meditación. FatCamera / Getty Images

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What Is Ghosting?

When a Friend or Romantic Interest Disappears Without Explanation

Wendy Rose Gould is a lifestyle reporter with over a decade of experience covering health and wellness topics.

 Verywell / Catherine Song

• Increased Use
• Why It Happens
• How to Cope
• Why You Shouldn't Ghost

Alternatives to Ghosting Someone

• Is It Ever OK?

Ghosting is a relatively new colloquial dating term that refers to abruptly cutting off contact with someone without giving that person any warning or explanation for doing so.

Even when the person being ghosted reaches out to re-initiate contact or gain closure, they’re met with silence. As you can see, it’s called ghosting because it involves someone essentially “vanishing” into thin air as if they were a ghost.

The term is generally used in reference to a romantic relationship, but it can technically refer to any scenario where contact unexpectedly ceases, including friendships and family relationships.

Signs of Ghosting

Ghosting is often obvious, but it can also be a gradual process. The other person might start by 'soft ghosting,' where they progressively minimize contact over a period of time. Some early signs that someone might be ghosting you include:

• They regularly bail out on plans to get together
• They struggle to make commitments
• They don't like to share personal information
• They don't want you to meet their friends or family
• They disappear from social media
• They rarely respond to your texts or calls
• Your conversations with them lack depth, and they seem disinterested

If you have made repeated efforts to contact someone and they won't respond, it is a strong indicator that you've been ghosted.

Ghosting can also occur on social media. It involves cutting off all social media contact with another person without explanation. The other person may unfriend, unfollow, or even block you on all social media platforms. They may even go so far as to deactivate or delete their social accounts to prevent all contact.

The History of Ghosting

The term "ghosting" became mainstream about seven years ago alongside the surge in online dating ; it became an official entry in the Merriam-Webster dictionary in 2017 . Interestingly, though, the term was actually used as far back as the 1990s. Some pop culture writers and scholars have even used the term to describe ghostwriting in hip-hop music.  

Bree Jenkins, LMFT

The word ‘ghosting’ gained popularity long before [2017] via ‘90s hip-hop, often in the sense of escaping.

Though a new term, the act of ghosting existed well before the digital age. “I think references of ‘going for a loaf of bread and never coming back’ are examples of ghosting," says Bree Jenkins, LMFT , a dating coach in Los Angeles, Calif. "Ghosting used to be leaving a person and moving away or not leaving [them with] your contact information—its earlier origins are even the simple act of leaving a party or social gathering without notice and goodbyes.” 

How the Term Became Popular

So why did the term “ghosting” become mainstream just within the last decade? The argument is that online dating has simply made it way easier to ghost people.

With the higher frequency of ghosting instances, and with more people who could relate/understand being ghosted or doing the ghosting, the term was widely adopted.

Why Do Some People Choose to Ghost?

Ghosting is often seen as an immature or passive-aggressive way to end a relationship. In other instances, it may even be a form of emotional abuse.

There are two primary reasons why a person ghosts another, and often it's a combination of the two.

It's the Easy Route

The first is that some find it's way easier (in the short-term, anyway) to ghost someone than to have an awkward, uncomfortable heart-to-heart about why you’re not interested in maintaining contact.

The person doing the ghosting often wants to avoid confrontation or dealing with someone else’s hurt feelings, so they simply cease all communication and hope the hint is delivered.

Option Overload and Fatigue

“With internet dating comes what may seem like infinite choices as opposed to walking into a bar and having limited options," explains Margaret Seide, MD , a board-certified psychiatrist based in New York City.

"Because there are so many choices, online daters are quick to have the ‘OK, next’ or the ‘Yeah, but what else?’ mindset," says Seide. "Sometimes the person is nice enough, but is juggling a few other people and that person just didn’t make the cut.”

There are also other reasons why people ghost, including being fearful of the other person's reaction to rejection.

How Ghosting Can Impact the Ghosted

As you can imagine (or know from personal experience), ghosting can have a real psychological impact on the person who’s being ghosted.

It’s almost like sudden loss [or] grief, especially the first time you’ve ever been ghosted. You are shocked, and you’re in denial, thinking things such as ‘maybe they didn’t see my text.’ Then you feel anger.

Jenkins adds, “Next, the feelings of depression [can] kick in along with feelings of poor self-esteem as you mentally reexamine your relationship and last conversation for possible warning signs."

Ghosting is inherently ambiguous because there is a lack of explanation for why the relationship ended. For the person who has been ghosted, it can lead to significant feelings of rejection, guilt, grief, and shame.

A person who has been ghosted may be left wondering what this type of behavior says about them, but it is important to remember that ghosting says more about the person who cuts off contact than the person who is ghosted.

Working Through Grief After Being Ghosted

The grief cycle may not run that exact course, but being ghosted often triggers a flood of ranging emotions. Thoughts of ‘Not only did the person not want to date me, but I wasn’t even deserving of an explanation’ can make someone feel dehumanized and devalued.

It’s often more painful when it’s a relationship that’s marinated a bit, but the ghosted person can also feel this way if it was a new connection. It can take some time to work through the pain, but with acceptance the person being ghosted can move on.

To gain closure in a situation where you feel you’ve been ghosted, Meide says it can help to send a message by saying something like, “Hey, I haven’t heard from you in a while. I’m not sure what happened, but I don’t want to continue pursuing this. My time is valuable and I don’t want to leave this door open. Best of luck with things.” While the ghoster may not respond, it can help provide closure.

How Ghosting Can Impact the Ghoster

Ghosting doesn't just impact the ghosted; it also is a detriment to the ghoster. The bottom line here is that ghosting is either a passive aggressive way to end a relationship, or it is the “easy way out.” Either way, it’s not doing the ghoster any favors in their ability to communicate with others.

“Ghosting doesn't take into account how you affect other people and it makes it easier for the person to dip out or disengage when things get uncomfortable. There’s no way to have a healthy, long-term relationship without being able to work through problems and use your communication skills,” says Jenkins.

Jenkins adds that ghosters create unhealthy problem-solving patterns for themselves, and that they also contribute to a larger pattern of societal flakiness that increases their chances of being ghosted as well.

Avoiding the easy route of ghosting someone will benefit both parties. Meide says that the best thing you can do when ending a relationship , however long or short, is to treat the other person as you’d like to be treated.

“I usually suggest two spoons of sugar with the medicine in the middle for delivery,” Meide says. “It can sound something like ‘Hey, you seem like a really great catch, but I don’t feel it’s working between us. I respect your time and just wanted to be honest. Warm regards and take care.’

"Or, ‘Hi—it’s been cool getting to know you, but I’ve decided to take a break from dating and don’t want to waste your time or be dishonest. Best of luck with everything.’"

These messages are short, sweet, honest, and end with an outro to signal that you don’t want to have a long and drawn out conversation. It’s possible that you may get a negative or hurt reaction from the other person, but it’s far better to exit the relationship after giving an explanation than to ghost completely.

Is Ghosting Someone Ever OK?

In many cases, ghosting is considered a rude route to take when trying not to talk to someone anymore, or especially when ending a more serious or established relationship. However, there are most definitely exceptions—when further communication can be a bad thing or even potentially unsafe.

Situations in which ghosting can make sense is if you find out the person is married or in a relationship , participating in illegal or unsavory behaviors, or if they display toxic traits.   In such cases, you do not owe that person an explanation for abruptly ending the relationship. 

If you are uncomfortable or feel threatened by someone in any way, remember it's best to follow your gut instinct. You may simply have a bad feeling. In cases like this, you don't need to prove that this person "deserved" to be ghosted—ghosting might be a useful mode of self-protection and peace of mind.

If you feel your best interest would be to completely cut off contact with the person in question, don't let your feelings of guilt keep you from doing what's right for you and what will ultimately keep you safe.

A Word From Verywell

Ghosting has become more commonplace in the digital age, but just because something is easy or common doesn’t mean it’s always the ideal route to take. Consider how ghosting might impact both parties and do your best to treat others with kindness and honesty. If you’re the person who’s been ghosted, it’s OK to feel confused, sad, and angry. Sending a quick note to end the relationship yourself can help you regain a sense of power and confidence in yourself and give you closure.

However, if you feel threatened or deeply uncomfortable by someone, you don't owe them anything. Sometimes ghosting, when used thoughtfully, can be a healthy mode of self-protection and removing yourself from a potentially bad situation.

Navarro R, Larrañaga E, Yubero S, Víllora B. Psychological Correlates of Ghosting and Breadcrumbing Experiences: A Preliminary Study among Adults . Int J Environ Res Public Health . 2020;17(3):1116. doi:10.3390/ijerph17031116

Anderson HE. No Bitin’ Allowed: A Hip-Hop Copying Paradigm for All of Us . 2011.

 Vilhauer J. When Is It OK to Ghost Someone ? Psychology Today . 2019.

By Wendy Rose Gould Wendy Rose Gould is a lifestyle reporter with over a decade of experience covering health and wellness topics.

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Definition of ghosting

Examples of ghosting in a sentence.

These examples are programmatically compiled from various online sources to illustrate current usage of the word 'ghosting.' Any opinions expressed in the examples do not represent those of Merriam-Webster or its editors. Send us feedback about these examples.

Word History

1919, in the meaning defined at sense 1

Dictionary Entries Near ghosting

ghost kitchen

Cite this Entry

“Ghosting.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary , Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/ghosting. Accessed 16 Oct. 2023.

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Meaning of ghosting in English

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ghosting noun [U] ( WRITING FOR SOMEONE )

• Some writers might decide to take up ghosting.
• He worked on the ghosting of the general's bestselling autobiography .
• How did he react to the book ghosting claims ?
• bang something out
• bash something out
• borrow something from something
• readability
• reformulate

ghosting noun [U] ( STOPPING COMMUNICATION )

• Ghosting is a way of splitting up with someone or avoiding going on another date .
• Sending a break-up text is better than ghosting.
• Ghosting can happen to anyone.
• affiliation order
• break something up
• break up with someone
• child support
• give someone the heave-ho idiom
• give someone the push idiom
• go off with someone
• run out on someone/something
• throw someone over

You can also find related words, phrases, and synonyms in the topics:

ghosting noun [U] ( UNCLEAR IMAGE )

• Ghosting is the appearance of shadow-like images on the screen .
• High-definition video was sharper , but still showed some ghosting.
• The moon had six to eight overlapping copies , a distortion called ghosting.
• melt (away) into something
• not see hide nor hair of someone idiom
• sink without (a) trace idiom
• super-subtle

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Reviewed by Psychology Today Staff

Ghosting is abruptly ending communication with someone without explanation. The concept most often refers to romantic relationships but can also describe disappearances from friendships and the workplace.

People respond to being ghosted in many ways, from feeling indifferent to deeply betrayed. Some believe that ghosting is inseparably intertwined with modern electronic communication, and the practice is a way to cope with the decision fatigue that can accompany dating . Others believe that ghosting is emotionally troubling given that it offers no sense of closure.

• How to Handle Being Ghosted
• Why It’s Easy For Some People to Disappear

The phenomenon of abruptly disappearing from people’s lives isn’t new–but it seems to be more common today. Technology has made ghosting an easy way to dissolve relationships. According to a 2018 study, approximately 25 percent of men and women reported having been ghosted in a romantic relationship , and 22 percent admitted to having ghosted someone else. The Federal Reserve even recognized the phenomenon in a 2018 report, in which employers reported being ghosted by employees in a tight labor market.

The reason for being ghosted often has a lot to do with the ghoster, rather than with the ghostee. Cutting off communication spares the individual from confrontation, taking responsibility, or engaging in the emotional labor of empathy—despite the benefit a conversation can provide. In effect, it is much more convenient to vanish.

Being ghosted feels confusing because you don't know if the relationship is really over, or if there is a different reason for the person's absence. You may worry that something terrible has befallen the person. When you do realize the relationship is over, you have no idea what happened or what you did wrong. You feel that you are to blame.

This likely depends on the duration of the relationship. If the person did not text you after your second or third date, it is probably futile to contact the person, and you are likely better off without them . If the relationship’s duration was for a longer period, perhaps months, a message or email may be warranted. Be direct and ask for honesty.

They do sometimes reappear. Perhaps the person might send you a message through mutual friends or pop up online through likes and nudges. Some even send apologetic texts, emails, or even voice messages. You might consider listening to what the person has to say, as it takes some courage on the ghoster's part to apologize . However, you must be emotionally aware and figure out whether they are being genuine, and not just bored .

The important thing to remember: No one can make you feel low  self-worth unless you allow it. Plus, it is totally fine to feel hurt. However, an extended period of crappy feelings may not be warranted, especially if the time spent with your ghoster was not extended itself. Instead, make time for self-care, eat right, sleep right, stay physically active, see friends. If you need help, contact a therapist .

Sometimes disappearing is necessary . If the person starts to make you feel at all uncomfortable, you will have to weigh your decision to vanish. Perhaps, the person shows anger that feels dangerous and unsafe. Or the person does not appear to have boundaries such as contacting someone else you dated, looking for information. Or the person may start showing dark traits of manipulation,  lying , and other forms of deceit.

The desire to avoid discomfort can apply to a wide range of situations. After flirting for a while, a man or woman may disappear rather than admit they’ve lost interest . Someone who feels mistreated by a friend might stop responding rather than confront them. A teenager who feels frustrated by a minimum wage job might spontaneously stop showing up to work instead of giving notice.

When ghosters decide to leave a relationship, they factor in the time they invested and the level of engagement in the relationship. If, for example, the two parties dated once or twice, disappearing may seem to be a viable decision for the ghoster. They do not wish to lead the other person on, and they rationalize the departure as compassionate and reasonable.

Many cultures promote the idea of the soul mate or destiny beliefs, as evident in the classic Hollywood rom-com. Seeking the one and only partner for life is a fixed idea of how relationships should work, and it gives people the license to disappear from the face of the earth when a relationship is not up to their ideal. When a person does something for true love and what is their destiny, then it is okay to leave.

Technology may contribute to the tendency to ghost: Research suggests that the high volume of potential prospects on dating apps may make each individual person appear more disposable. Just swipe right. Another attitude that may foster ghosting is believing in destiny. One study found that people who believe in relationship destiny—that everyone has a soulmate waiting to sweep them off their feet—were much more likely to believe that ghosting was acceptable.

People who ghost must conduct a degree of emotional gymnastics. In cognitive dissonance, a person’s actions may be inconsistent with their beliefs and values; they must therefore convince themselves that their actions are right and just. They also convince themselves that the other person would prefer to avoid a tangled and difficult conversation as well. Otherwise, feelings of guilt and cowardice may plague them.

Offshoots of ghosting behavior, orbiting  and breadcrumbing , refer to leading you on. After someone breaks off relations, they carry on engaging with you by orbiting; this often happens through interactions via social media—leaving a like or comment or poke, for example—without speaking to the person beyond that. Breadcrumbing is related to orbiting. The person may send frequent communications, also in the form of comments and likes online. However, all the contact never amounts to anything real. These confusing situations can instill a sense of false hope for the relationship.

Caspering is friendly ghosting, named after the friendly cartoon ghost, Casper. This simple form of ending contact is not ghosting per se, but rather a firm and direct statement that conveys you will not be seeing the person again. It can be short and sweet, as in:  Thank you for taking time to meet. I hope everything works out well for you. Bye."  It doesn't have to be so hard.

Personal Perspective: Mental health needs to be protected, but it shouldn’t be used to avoid social responsibility.

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Ghosting is deeply hurtful, often leaving the person ghosted feeling confused and abandoned. How to heal the wound of heartbreak and alleviate rumination.

Explore the damaging effects of ghosting and breadcrumbing on job applicants and discover the solutions for a respectful hiring process.

Some who endure physical, psychological, or emotional suffering choose no contact as a last resort; This tactic protects and insulates a family member from endless hurt.

How to manage the vanishing act, whether you're the offender or victim.

Relationship transitions can be difficult, and avoidance may seem an attractive way out, but ghosting is an unhealthy form of relational aggression that is fundamentally unkind.

The illness or death of an estranged family member can be vexing for surviving relatives. Should they say goodbye? Attend the funeral? Send flowers?

Ghosting may be a sign of disconnection in relationships as well as in society.

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Supreme Court tells Fifth Circuit to stop its defiance in ghost gun case

Nina Totenberg

Ghost guns are unassembled and unmarked guns that can be bought online, and then assembled into fully operative guns. In August 2022, ATF issued regulations that required any such disassembled gun parts to carry serial numbers and required anyone buying them to pass a background check. Yuki Iwamura /AFP via Getty Images hide caption

Ghost guns are unassembled and unmarked guns that can be bought online, and then assembled into fully operative guns. In August 2022, ATF issued regulations that required any such disassembled gun parts to carry serial numbers and required anyone buying them to pass a background check.

The U.S. Supreme Court on Monday once again stepped in to leave in place the federal government's ban on so-called "ghost guns." These are unassembled and unmarked guns that can be bought online, and then assembled into fully operative guns.

The Biden Administration Just Regulated 'Ghost Guns.' What Does That Mean?

In August 2022, the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms and Explosives issued regulations that required any such disassembled gun parts to carry serial numbers and required anyone buying them to pass a background check, in the same manner as in-person gun-buyers. The gun manufacturers challenged the regulations in court, and Federal Judge Reed O'Connor in Texas issued a nationwide injunction barring the rule from going into effect.

The Supreme Court, however, blocked those decisions from going into effect, whereupon two of the manufacturers returned to Judge O'Connor's court, and won an order barring the government from enforcing its regulations. The Fifth Circuit upheld that order, too.

The Biden administration is regulating 'ghost guns.' Here's what the rule does

The government asked the high court to void, rather than just pause, the lower court rulings to send a message that lower courts should not "countermand" the high court's "authoritative determination."

Now the Supreme Court has once again repudiated the lower courts, voiding the lower court orders and allowing the ATF regulations to go into effect pending further litigation.

There were no noted dissents.

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What is Friday the 13th? Why people may be superstitious about the day

Spooky season is officially here. Scorching summers have finally cooled off, a yassified jack-o-lantern has taken over Tik Tok, and people are uniting over a hatred of candy corn .

But nothing is quite as spooky as a Friday the 13th that falls in October, and this is one of those years. The 13th day of the month falls on a Friday one to three times a year. This is the second Friday the 13th this year ( the most recent one was in January ), and the next one won't be until September 2024.

Fear for Friday the 13th may have been amplified by the slasher-movie series , but where did the superstition originate?

Dr. Phil Stevens, retired anthropology professor from the University at Buffalo and author of an upcoming book "Rethinking the Anthropology of Magic and Witchcraft: Inherently Human", spoke with USA TODAY about the holiday and why it is an example of "magical thinking."

Why people get ink on Friday the 13th: How the day became lucky for the tattoo industry

Superstitions, taboos and good luck numbers are forms of magical thinking

Stevens said that he likes to think of the superstition around Friday the 13th as an example of magical thinking. He says that magical thinking is when someone believes is there is a causal relationship between two things that are otherwise unrelated. For example, Friday and 13 together take on a different quality when they fall on the same day.

He also thinks of it as a taboo, as superstition has a negative connotation, even when someone uses it to describe their own belief.

"The word taboo actually is appropriate for this kind of a superstition. Because it's the it's the term that means avoiding establishing a magical connection. People can actively work magic to make things happen, recognizing the connections between things, but if the connections between things could cause an unfortunate result, then people avoid those connections." Stevens said.

Some people look for positive connections between things. For example, China kicked off the Olympics in 2008 at 8:08 p.m. on the eight day of the eight month because the number is associated with good luck.

Another example is when someone has a good luck charm or assigns a higher value to an item after it has belonged to a celebrity, Stevens said.

Biblical origins of Friday and the number 13

Friday the 13th combines two taboos that come from the bible, accord to Stevens. Based on the story of the Last Supper of Jesus, 13 people were seated at the table and it happened on a Thursday. He was arrested that evening, and crucified the next day, on a Friday.

"So 13 is associated with that terrible event. And Friday, the 13th you get a double whammy. You get both of these elements coming together: the taboo against 13, and the crucifixion, which was on a Friday," Stevens said.

Even though the taboo is tied to the Last Supper, Stevens said it didn't become widespread until 1,000 years after Jesus's story when more people became interested in the bible. Now he thinks the taboo is weakening as people embrace the number 13 more, and it is only a matter of time before it phases out.

Why superstitions are a universal human experience

Stevens said superstitions, taboos and lucky numbers are part of a human need to find order in a crazy world.

"I suggest that some form of superstitious behavior will be eternal," Stevens said. "Some form of magical thinking will also be evident, because it gives us some measure of control. The world is vast, complex, impersonal, unpredictable and the sense that one has little bit of control over things is comforting."

So whether avoiding black cats, cracks on the sidewalk or looking over your shoulder on Friday the 13th, Stevens says it all makes you perfectly human.

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A Quick Look at Hamas

The Islamist militant group that controls Gaza has taken its attacks on Israel to a new level, building on decades of hostilities.

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By Tiffany May

• Oct. 8, 2023

The Hamas militant movement launched one of the largest assaults on Israel in decades on Saturday, killing hundreds of people, kidnapping soldiers and civilians and leading Israel to declare war. The largest of the armed Islamist groups in the Palestinian territory, Hamas governs the Gaza Strip, home to two million people.

What is Hamas?

Hamas was founded in 1987 by Sheik Ahmed Yassin, who was active in the Muslim Brotherhood, during the first Palestinian uprising against the Israeli military control of the West Bank and Gaza.

Hamas has since been responsible for suicide attacks against Israeli civilians, and the kidnapping and killing of Israeli soldiers. The United States is among the countries that have deemed it a terrorist group. But Hamas is also the governing power in the Gaza Strip.

Unlike the Palestine Liberation Organization, led by Mahmoud Abbas, Hamas does not recognize Israel’s right to exist as a state and has spoken about driving all Jews from the region. It has advocated an uncompromising position on the creation of a Palestinian state based on Islamic fundamentalism stretching from the Mediterranean east to the Jordan River.

What is its role in the Palestinian territories?

An Arabic acronym for Islamic Resistance Movement, Hamas was founded on three pillars: religion, charity and the fight against Israel.

For years it has had a contentious relationship with its rival Palestinian party, Fatah, led by Mahmoud Abbas. A year after Israel’s 2005 withdrawal from Gaza, Hamas won Palestinian legislative elections, beating Fatah. In 2007, after factional fighting in Gaza, it ousted the Fatah-dominated Palestinian Authority and seized control of the Gaza Strip.

In the early years, Hamas was widely embraced by Palestinians as the group most willing to resist Israel, and it was seen by some as less corrupt and better organized than the Palestinian Authority. But dissatisfaction has risen as Palestinians’ lives have worsened amid conflict and years of Israeli and Egyptian blockade, and some feel the group’s attacks have damaged Palestinians as well.

Who are its allies and supporters?

Within the Gaza Strip, Hamas and Islamic Jihad , the second largest militant group in the region, are frequently united against Israel.

Islamic Jihad often acts independently of Hamas and is focused primarily on military confrontation. On some occasions, Hamas has exerted pressure on Islamic Jihad to stop attacks or retaliation against Israel or stayed on the sidelines as the group clashed with Israel. At others, Hamas has been drawn into battle.

Hamas is allied with Middle Eastern countries like Syria and entities like the Shiite Islamist group Hezbollah in Lebanon that oppose U.S. and Israeli policies. One of its most vocal supporters is Iran, which has its own interests in battling Israel. For decades, Iran has given Hamas weapons, technology and training to build its own arsenal of advanced rockets that can reach deep into Israeli territory.

Tiffany May covers news from Asia. She joined The Times in 2017. More about Tiffany May

Our Coverage of the Israel-Hamas War

A Looming Invasion: As   Israel’s military prepares to invade the Gaza Strip , Israelis are grappling with a total breakdown of trust in the government .

A Humanitarian Crisis in Gaza:  Israel ordered people in the north of Gaza to evacuate to the south , creating an impossible dilemma for hospitals .

Fears of Escalation:  The Biden administration has grown increasingly anxious  that Israel’s enemies may seek to widen the war with Hamas .

Recounting the Attack:  Since Hamas’s assault on Israel, fresh accounts  have emerged of just how extreme  and widespread  the violence was.

In the United States

An Anti-Muslim Attack: The authorities in Illinois accused a man of fatally stabbing a 6-year-old boy  in an attack that officials tied to the fighting in Israel and Gaza .

Jewish Americans: For many American Jews, there have been too many emotions to process . Young people spoke of fear, shock, solidarity and helplessness .

Palestinian Americans: U.S. Palestinians are dismayed by the violence, but some said that politicians and news outlets are overlooking historical context .

On College Campuses: Powerful donors are demanding that elite universities denounce students  for criticizing Israel so soon after the Hamas attack.